It’s been over 5 weeks since we entered Lockdown on March 23rd, and ever since I’ve been living in what seems like a little bubble, alone in North Leeds.
If I’m honest it’s not been all bad, at times it’s almost felt like a relief for the world to slow down, that is if I forget about the horrors of the situation for a while. As someone who struggles with anxiety and at times depression, I have have often wanted the world to stop. Let me take a breath. Though, of course, I would never have traded this for our current, sad situation.
I’ve looked out of my window more often than ever and was amazed and delighted to watch the trees sprout their leaves overnight. I have never ever noticed this so precisely before! Usually I walk or run around with a foggy brain and can’t pinpoint the timing of these changes, so I feel happy about that! I’ve also been enjoying watching a homely-looking visitor sun himself in the tree opposite, basking in the beautiful weather that April brought – a plump wood pigeon.
I’ve been forced to live in the moment a bit more, and pay more attention to nature. And this I like, I am wondering how I can hold on to this when things eventually return to normal?
Though sometimes it’s felt more of a struggle. I’m guessing I won’t be alone in having good days and bad days. I’m acutely aware that for some people times are really hard right now. At times I’ve felt guilty about not doing more, but I’m determined not to let these thoughts and feelings linger. I try to exercise a bit of self-compassion on tricky days, and I find fresh air helps to clear my mind. I remind myself that by staying at home, I am doing my bit, as we all are. I hope you are all okay!